fumble

I have to learn how to get angry. I mean, not just upset or irritated. I mean really red hot angry. I don't remember ever being that angry. I wish I could yell and shout and rant sometimes, but its simply impossible.

Even sometimes, when the temperature has reached boiling point and I march down to blast the person responsible, what usually happens is that after the first few words, I simply don't see the point. As in, my brain suddenly starts asking me if the matter is really that important. And the obvious answer is no.

As soon as this happens, I start fumbling (one can't yell with our brain whispering to you all the time, right?) and the effect is completely lost. Once or twice, to my sheer embarrasment, I even ended up smiling! Gosh, the agony!